Louise, a client of mine, was a sleepwalker who came to see me because she had awakened in the middle of the night about a block away from her home. To make
matters worse, she had locked herself out. Trying to attract her partner’s attention without waking the whole neighborhood convinced her she needed to find a cure for her perplexing malady. As a psychotherapist, I was part of her support system while she waded through various medical doctors and medicines. Together we found a few exercises that cut her sleepwalking episodes in half. One was a simple awareness practice.
We started small. Before falling asleep, Louise affirmed, “I will wake up while I’m still in the house.” Of course, she and her partner also augmented the intentions and medications with practical tools like chairs in front of the doors. As she progressed, her affirmation of awareness became, “I will wake up before I get out of bed.” And she did. With practice and patience, Louise was ultimately able to stop all medication and sleep normally most of the time.
I couldn’t help noticing how similar my own daytime rushing and that of other clients was to Louise’s subconscious nighttime meanderings. Without conscious commitment, awareness, and practice, it’s easy to sleep-live our lives away. In order to awaken from the autopilot activity of sleep-living and savor life to the fullest, it’s important to Stop, Look, Listen, and Feel. Because it’s a shift in attitude and focus, the practice of stop-look-listen-feel can be done quickly at any time and in anyplace; while ironing, working at the computer, making love, cleaning the litter box, in class, dancing, cooking, driving...
Pausing to take note of what you’re seeing, hearing, and feeling is an incredibly important touchstone for mindful living. A few sixty-second check-ins a day can make an amazing difference in how you feel and lay valuable groundwork for building mindful habits. As with all the practices, it’s important to lovingly and gently accept and embrace what you discover.
PRACTICE...
• Become aware when you have fallen into sleep-living. (This may be the hardest part of the practice until you become accustomed to being aware of yourself.)
• Wake up to what you are seeing. What beauty is there to appreciate right now?
• Listen to the sounds around you. Identify one for which you are thankful.
• Check on your feelings. Is a feeling calling attention to itself? If so, breathe deeply into the part of your body holding the feeling. Love the feeling even if you would rather avoid or resist it.
THROUGHOUT YOUR DAY...
• After each check-in, express—and feel, if you can— gratitude for the gifts of sight, hearing, and feeling.
With loving kindness, pause to look, listen, and feel.
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